Having written this blog it was simply to long. Here are the first three ways to be more persuasive based on neuroscience. The last four ways to be more persuasive based on neuroscience will be in my blog next week on November 19, 2018.
What are the influences that persuade us to change are minds? Tali Sharot is the author of a new book entitled The Influential Mind: What the Brain Reveals About Our Power to Change Others that offers some great ideas. She suggests seven key thoughts on this topic that I found very inciteful that I thought you may find interesting too. If you can’t wait until next week buy her book These are the seven concepts for your consideration.
1. We are shaped by previous experience
We are all shaped by our previous experiences. When we receive new information and it confirms what we already thought we cognitively accept the data. If the new information does not, we tend to attack the new information. How do we overcome this? We need to start by exploring ways to find common ground. Instead of “I disagree with what you just stated”, perhaps beginning with “I can agree with …“ and focus on any elements in common focusing on values rather than beliefs. Perhaps a statement like “We may disagree, but we both agree that… “ and go on from there.
2. Emotion is very important
When two individuals are ‘in sync” with one another we are operating on all cylinders. Think of how good that feels. We can have a very positive, interactive and even humorous interaction with one another. Think of pleasant conversations. When we feel this way we share feelings with a story and/or with humor. You should not try to connect with the person on the item we want to discuss until you have connected emotionally first. What are examples of things that bring us pleasure? Puppies? Baby pictures? Consider what you can offer to make the emotion positive given your and their emotional interests. We do this because emotions really matter in negotiations and when trying to persuade others.
3. Positive incentives are very valuable
Our brains are oriented towards obtaining rewards and minimizing pain. Anticipation of reward is usually stronger than fear. This is one reason that video games are so popular. Well before the vacation think how pleasant it is to imagine being on the vacation. The anticipation of the vacation generates significant joy well before ever taking the vacation. However, if you want someone to not do something, warnings about negatives is very persuasive. Bad consequences can be very helpful. Incentives will get you what you want. Negative reinforcement will help prevent further actions.
4. The need for control
5. Encourage curiosity so the other party will listen after having been listened to
6. Do not provide threatening information
7. We are impacted by others
These seven ideas allow us to persuade ourselves and others. Knowing this information, consider how you may interact with others you want to persuade in the future.
To read a more detailed synopsis of the book read this commentary from Eric Barker, the author of Barking Up The Wrong Tree. Next week I will elaborate on the last four concepts.